An article on society's role in helping autistic individuals and their caregivers

Dear everyone:

Here is the second article of my two-article series that addresses the challenges of raising an autistic individual. In this piece, I will be exploring the role of society in helping autistic individuals and their caregivers. Instead of expecting caregivers and specialised institutions to care for individuals with autism, I suggest that society can play a more active role by showing openness and compassion. This article also describes Sebastien's independent expeditions to his coach's gym and school, accompanied by a laminated card displaying his information and my phone number. Thus, I am seeking the public's participation in looking out for him. I think this is an interesting article that can stretch the discourse on autism and special needs.


1. Below is an excerpt of the article.


What Would It Take?
By Choo Kah Ying

If it takes a village to raise a ‘typical’ child, what would it take to raise one with autism who would grow up to be a dependent adult?...

For many years, I expected nothing of society. With my feet straggling the two irreconcilable worlds of autism and mainstream society, I saw myself as the buffer to ward off any possible clashes arising from Sebastien’s lack of awareness of social conventions and others’ taking offense by his social faux pas. Sticking close to him and watching his every move with eagle-eye vigilance, I would be poised to direct him as discreetly as I could with my facial expressions and hand gestures...

But alas, I am no match for the hormonal fluctuations and the growth spurt, which come with puberty. Sebastien, at 14, is already towering over most Asian men with broad shoulders and a young man’s swagger. Accompanying his physical transformation is his defiant claim to be his own person, make his own mistakes and face consequences that he may not be able to fully conceptualise. My recent run-ins with Sebastien, like the day when he lunged aggressively at me in a jam-packed NTUC hypermart, have forced me to face up to a new reality. My role as his protector has become obsolete.

Whether I think he is ready or not, I am no longer strong enough to be the middleman who can prevent the possible clashes between Sebastien and mainstream society. In the event of such a collision, I can only hope that both parties would emerge largely unscathed, and perhaps, even with some understanding. The world would have to teach him what I have been unable to. And yes, I have also come to accept, albeit reluctantly, the distinctive possibility that he can get into far bigger trouble than I can contain.

Sebastien’s straining against my tutelage is his signal to me that my time as his exclusive caregiver and teacher is up. Each day, as I watch him step out of the front door, my heart is filled with trepidation. With his fearless strides, Sebastien thinks he is ready for the world. But is the world ready for him? Would a society that knows little about autism treat him with tolerance, forbearance and compassion?...


Here is the link to the full article: http://www.awakeningminds.sg/articles_what_would_it_take.html

2. Support Group for Caregivers of children with autism: I am dedicating the last Sunday of every month to a support group for caregivers of children with autism (7:30 - 9 p.m.). Caregiving can feel like such an isolated journey that caregivers need to come together in a supportive space where they can share with others what they have learnt or what they are going through. There will be some light refreshments. Participants can also bring stuff if they like. There are no obligations or membership requirements.

For this month, the meeting will be held on Sunday, March 27th, 7:30 p.m.- 9 p.m.

Please RSVP me with the number of people coming by Thursday (March 24th) and contact information (mobile number and email). If I do not have at least 3 participants (including myself), I will cancel the meeting.

I am happy to host the meeting (Orchard; address will be given to those who have confirmed their participation), though I am open to us having rotating locations...

3. Highlights of my Website:

Books: http://www.awakeningminds.sg/books.html: my published books on autism, manic depression and a storywriting template and workbook.

Workshops (My proposed topics): http://www.awakeningminds.sg/workshops.html: my self-formulated workshops covering autism, caregiving, educational strategies, behavioural management and creative writing.

http://www.awakeningminds.sg/mental_wellness_workshops.html: my workshops on mental wellness and caregiving.

Workshops conducted: http://www.awakeningminds.sg/past_events.html: a comprehensive listing of all talks and workshops I have conducted.

Consultations: http://www.awakeningminds.sg/consultations.html, http://www.awakeningminds.sg/mental_wellness_consultations.html: my private, home-based consultations for families and institutions.

Learning Materials: http://www.awakeningminds.sg/learning_materials.html: Learning materials designed for children with learning difficulties.

Articles: http://www.awakeningminds.sg/articles.html: Articles on autism, special needs, mental wellness and parenting by me, as well as articles featuring me and Sebastien, written by journalists.

Please feel free to share this email with others who may be interested.

Regards,

Kah Ying